Learning The Hard Way That My Dad Is Right About My Boyfriends
Parents are constantly giving their children advice. Advice about which drugs to try and which ones may kill you, advice about what to wear and what not to wear. Parents even go as far as to advise their children about relationships. However, I can definitely say that the majority of the advice that I receive from my parents does not always apply to or provide a solution to my situations.
My parents give both good and bad advice. When my parents provide an adequate solution to my problems, it is because they have experienced it for themselves. Therefore, my dad is usually right about men I date.
My father may be a great dad and admirable man today, but I would argue that was not the case when he was my age. The only reason that my father is right about a few dirty bastards I dated, or dealt with in the past, is because he used to be that assh*le guy. Not all fathers may have a past full of being an ass or a sneak in relationships, but that is probably why your father does not give accurate advice about men. With age comes experience, so even if my dad has never acted similar to one of my boyfriends, he has encountered a comparable personality.
I had one boyfriend who was freaking out when I was driving on the edge of a mountain in Orange County. Seriously, he was cringing in his seat not wanting to be near the edge. I am afraid of heights, too, but I do not act like a wimp driving on a road; it is California – there are mountain ranges and cliffs everywhere. However, I will not be found walking across a ledge or bungee jumping. Therefore, I told my father about how this guy was fearful about driving on an edge, and his immediate response was, “He is a wimp, and has no balls.
You don’t want to deal with a pussy.” My dad was right. After the heights encounter, I noticed that my then boyfriend was not even willing to have a difficult conversation. What a wimpy-pussy-ass “man” he was. The wimp even decided to break up with me after I left his apartment, after I had mentioned my grievances with him and wanted to break-up (he obviously did not want to have the conversation in person).
Another guy I dated had FaceTimed my mother by mistake, and due to his fearful or surprised look, my dad decided that the guy was homosexual. Well, I cannot say that my dad was far off, for he did have a flamboyant way of dressing. The guy also seemed envious of the attention I received when we were out together – he even asked why women do not hit on him. Yep, my dad was right; he was probably gay. Love is blind, but my father is not.
Now, there is one man I dated who I wish I had mentioned to my father earlier. This man was tall (check), not a wimp (check), but he was a complete assh*le and had obsessive stalker tendencies! He would text other women when with me (I saw it on his phone), moved in with a women he used to screw while talking to me, yet had the audacity to continue to text and call me for three years.
I recently changed my number, because he does not understand the word “NO”! If I had mentioned this man to my father earlier on, he may have reminded him of himself. Once I realized this man-slut’s resemblance to my father’s old ways as a kid, I dropped him. Yes, one day this man may be a good guy to date or even marry, but for now, I know better.
I love my father, and in no way am I putting him down. There are differences between men and women; there’s a double standard. Thus, I do not judge my father for his past aggressions towards women, for if I never listened to his experiences, I would have fallen into similar traps. Yet, I do not have a desire to get with every man in the world. With age comes maturity, what seemed exciting to me, as a freshman is college, is nauseating today – similar to my dad and his experiences. You live, and you learn, or you could just listen to your parents every now and then.